“The greatest mistake we make is living in constant fear that we will make one.” - John Maxwell
Like most driven, motivated, type-a leaders, I'm not afraid of much. I'll make decisions, I'll lead teams, I'll take risks. I don't shy away from speaking in front of crowds of any size. At the top of my bucket list is diving with Great White sharks off the southern tip of Africa, and I'm not kidding when I say I'd do it in a heartbeat. I can really only think of two things I'm afraid of. The first is (in all seriousness) Cedar Point's freakishly tall, slow-moving, unstable deathtrap they call a ferris wheel. Go get on that thing and I promise you that by the time you get to the top (which takes about 10 minutes when you account for all the time you spend sitting still while they let people on and off) you believe you're going to die. Stop judging me, it's terrifying.
"You made us for yourself, and our heart is restless until it finds its place of rest in you."
I read those words for the first time about 3 years ago. I was in the middle of probably the most physically, mentally, and spiritually exhausting season of my life and a friend recommended that I should set aside 5 minutes a day and read through Confessions of St. Augustine. That quote was on the first page of the first section, titled Confession of the Greatness of God. I kept reading, but those words echoed in my mind. At the time, I was working an average of 55-60 hours a week, balancing all the same various aspects of life that you are probably trying to balance. I was playing with fire, lingering on the edge of burnout, and I didn't even know it. All I knew was that I felt constantly tired. I felt numb; I didn't experience normal highs and lows...just a consistent state of exhaustion. My spiritual life was hanging by a thread.